Making significant life changes can be very difficult, even if the conditions of the change are favorable. I felt very strongly that I was led to this place. I planned it. I wrote it down and dated it. I worked very hard to make it happen. And then, with much patience and deliberation I made it happen. I'm in a good place. I am where I wanted to be and where I felt so determined to get to. But am I content? That's the problem with most of us. No matter what we have or where we go or what we achieve, we are never satisfied. We're always looking around to see what we are missing, assuming that we have missed out on what we should have. But compared to what? My thoughts lately keep coming back to the word balance. There has to be a balance between drive and contentment. The danger lies in being the extreme one way or the other.
For example, there are those who are what I call the 'walking dead'. They hate their lives so much that they are miserable, and they make everyone around them miserable too. They are already dead, their bodies just don't know it. They just simply 'exist' waiting to take their final breath. They have no drive or ambitions in life. They have accepted the current state of their life and don't anyone dare try and change it. They feel like they have earned their misery.
The other extreme are those who never stop. They are so driven all they can think about is work, money, success, and material things. And no matter if they achieve great success, wealth or fame, it's never enough. They will always want more. They waste their lives chasing everything in this life that has no meaning and missing out on the things in life that money cannot buy. They are never content, no matter what life brings.
Somewhere in the middle, there's a balance between being happy with where you are and keeping the dream alive to move forward to something more. We must have dreams or visions to continue to grow. But we have to learn to be patient and content with the status quo until the train moves forward again. This has been a hard learned lesson for me. I don't conduct the train. How silly I would be to become impatient and try and operate the train engine. I wouldn't have any idea where to start. I better leave that job to the conductor.
A great Bible passage says, "I will climb my watchtower and wait to see what the Lord will tell me to say and what answer he will give to my complaint. The Lord gave me this answer: Write down clearly on tablets what I reveal to you, so that it can be read at a glance. Put it in writing, because it is not yet time for it to come true. But the time is coming quickly, and what I show you will come true. It may seem slow in coming, but wait for it; it will certainly take place, and it will not be delayed. " Habakkuk 2:1-3
I think our visions or dreams for our lives comes from God. And a great man once said that the ones you know are the right ones are the ones that you can't stop thinking about. So, we should write them down and put it somewhere where we can see it at a glance. Then we should have faith that when the time is right, it will be. And while you wait, that's the time to be content.
So for all my friends and family who keep asking me when I'm going to get back to work, I have to say that I am in the season of contentment. I am taking some much needed time to rest, clear my head, and meditate. I'm waiting for answers and listening to the winds of change. It's hard to hear if you never stop and get quiet. And as much as I value my alone time, being alone all the time has been a huge adjustment for me. But I decided long ago that being miserable alone is still better than being miserable with someone.
So, here I am. I look forward to every day as a chance to meet new faces, grow new friendships, and see what new opportunities present themselves to me. This blog was one, and I'm feeling good about it. I hope you at least enjoy the pictures! I promise to post funny stuff too.
Peace!
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